You care more about a show pony than you do me. I guess, I’ve become your fucking show pony. I guess, I’m a little aggressive. I want to burn you in Hell with all this words of heartbroken misfits. I don’t plan on becoming your lovely honor student. I’d rather rot away like your maggot-infested heart. I’ll look damn good when I stand next to you, so rot in hell. This isn’t something that’s temporary. It’s not you that I want to kill. I’d rather suffocate myself with my own hands ’cause I ain’t gonna let a bitch like you kill me! We smoke like bastards waiting for a life to come along. Smoking away the worthless words I tossed your way. Have you ever heard a breath I’ve taken, or am I a doll? Your plaything to stretch and squish until it breaks and I become your trash. I’ve already become trash to you. Well, FUCK YOU! I’m not sorry and I’d hate to apologize for popping out of a bitch. I’ll recite your tongue twister demands until I bite my tongue off. This blood is dirty with your demands. This blood is filthy just like yours. When I disappear, will you call me a fool, a coward, or will you just spill everything you wanted to say? I won’t scream in front of you. I won’t cry in front of you. This face is a porcelain mask to cover these hideous thoughts that you’ve never seen. Psssh! And you think I’m already hideous! You don’t know a fucking bit about me! Call yourself the mother of a monster or a saint doomed to forever suffer because of me. Well, suffer all you want. I wish to brand my mark into you until your fake composure that you passed to me cracks beneath your very feet. Let those tears run down your face until you turn as black as me. I’m the girl from the ashes; you can’t fucking beat me at burning in Hell! I’ll kiss your cuts with my neuroleptic lips. Let my delusion burn away your mind that you say is so precious.
I hate that you’ll never know how ugly I really am.
Rikki [not romance]