Everything’s been in fast forward lately. I was supposed to do so much this summer. Maybe influence a life or actually achieve a goal? But none of it gets done. What if my life continues this way? I mean, didn’t we all have dreams as children. What happened to those? What about being the firefighter to save a life? Where did he go? Oh, he began to work at Wal-Mart and just never got out. I don’t want that to be me! I never thought I’d be one of them when I was older. The question, how do I stop?
I guess this is just how our society runs. We dream up some fantasy, but like everything it’s moved to the back of our minds slowly, postponed for a lifetime. Soon every summer into fall and every fall into summer again. Nothing done. Will we all just keep driving home to our medium sized, white house just to wake up the next and bring our kids to school in the tan minivan? Where were the rockstars, actresses, ballerinas, firefighters, policemen? Where did the children of our hearts go?
We used to live like heroes; now we’re just average Joes.
“Did it all get real, I guess it’s real enough
They got refrigerators full of blood
Another century spent pointing guns
At anything that moves
Sometimes I worry that I’ve lost the plot
My twitching muscles tease my flippant thoughts
I never really dreamed of heaven much
Until we put him in the ground.”
It’s pretty late at the moment. But sleep has really been losing it’s meaning in my mind lately. I’ve probably slept a combined amount of 10 hours this whole week. Right now, I’m nearly certain my body has adapted to the lack of rest by producing its own caffine. Does that mean I’m going to be super short? Well, at least it’s the weekend now.
Maybe I should be overjoyed about the fact that it’s the weekend, but for some reason… I’m not. Actually, it’s not really just “some reason”. It’s more because of the fact that I’m going to Chinatown with my mom and sister
tomorrow today. And whever we go to Chinatown, we always end up going to my Grandmother’s house that she shares with just almost all seven of my aunts and uncles. I hope You want to know why I hate it? Because my extended family pretty much believes 3 things:
- Rock music makes you deaf, dumb, and drop out of high school.
- My sister is the perfect daughter and I should “be more like her”
- “Blacks” are worse.
Yeah, do you see why now?
Well, maybe I can track down a random empty room for me to lock myself in. Hey, I might be lucky and they won’t even try to talk to me. That way, I’ll be able to listen to my music and maybe get some writing done. That’d be nice. Especially because my writing mojo has comeback after it’s long, long vacation.
I’d better get going now. Let’s see if sleep actually does effect me anymore. And I also have to prepare my iPod by charging it up. Speaking of electronics, where the hell is my cell phone? I guess this is my cue.
You and me, me and you. That ended a long time ago…
“I hide behind these words
Think of all the places where you’ve been
Lost and found (out)
In between my sheets
In between the rights and the wrongs.”